Thursday Link Dump

Clever Manka, · Categories: Thursday Link Dump

All these glorious items (and more!) can be found at moon of retribvtion. And yes, I still occasionally ponder that FEMINIST KILLJOY collarbone tattoo but in the meantime I am 100% ordering that patch.

This is my idea of aging gracefully.

After these trivial but bracing exchanges, my pulse rate was normal, my cheeks were not red, I was not trembling. I hadn’t thought direct action would be so much fun. Habits of a lifetime peeled away. The world bristled with opportunities for a woman in her 70s to take a stand. I shouted on planes. I fought for my place in queues. I talked to myself out loud in public. I walked along the street singing a little song under my breath: “Back off. How dare you? Make my day.” I wouldn’t say I was on a hair-trigger. I was just primed for action.

A plea to bring back communal bathing.

Data mining, gendered pronoun/verb use, and thou.

Apparently monstrous women seems to be a web-wide thing right now.

The harpies were always thieves; it’s right there in the name, from harpezein, “snatcher.” In Homer, they’re storm spirits who carry people off unawares. But the defining story of the Harpies is the one canonized in the journey of the Argonauts, in which the Harpies are foul bird-woman creatures sent to torment King Phineus of Thrace. Any time Phineus is served food, the creatures swoop down and claw it away, either devouring it or rendering it inedible with their disgusting smell. They are ravenous, but their appetite isn’t just for food; what they can’t eat they are content to merely destroy. The important thing is that their target goes hungry.
A vulture that scavenged or befouled food would not be monstrous; wild creatures eat where they can and shit where they must. There are two things that make a harpy a monster: her single-minded focus on depriving others, and her human female face.

They don’t know me, but I feel like the organizers for The Rec Center included this story about porn gifs just for me.

A short paragraph of music links! Music for cats. All country songs are better when sung by women. Try Lazy Vibes for some calming (but not monotonous/drone) background music.

I was a high school journalist (I might have mentioned this before?) when the Hazelwood decision came down (nearly thirty years and still not over it) so the story about the teen journalists who took down their principal for lying on her resume has been giving me The Feels lately.

Five Myths about Non-Binary Transitioning

Once I realized that I did not have to “want to be a man” in order to be trans, I felt huge relief, and immediately settled down and got cozy with the label. Because for me, consciously identifying as transgender provided not just the gateway to invaluable resources, it also gifted me a community: a group of people I could see myself – my experiences, past, present, and possible futures – reflected in.

An article about the difference between representation and telling someone else’s story.

Food is one of the most important things in my life (I really, truly, madly, deeply, unapologetically, love food waaay beyond just what it means to generally enjoy eating), and have always been fascinated (and usually enraged by) food politics. If you’ve ever wondered why people will pay $25 for a plate of pasta but balk at more than $8 for a plate of curry, this (kind of old) article about spices and snobbery might be of interest.

I have a feeling that this person and I would probably get along. I already asked my local bookstore to order both of her books.

so yeah, even if people are relatively harmless it doesn’t mean you have to, like, be assaulted by their terrible memes. you don’t owe them shit! they’re not your mom! and if they are, you are not obligated to deal with her either!

26 Responses to “Thursday Link Dump”

  1. RoseCamelia says:

    I opened more tabs from this roundup than ever before. Thanks, Manka.

  2. Lynn says:

    i hate fighting. i'm sensitive and no good at it and if the consequence of bickering online means i gotta spend the afternoon feeling bad because a kid i don't remember from high school called me a fatass kelly price over a reductress article please murder me.

    IT ME.

  3. RoseCamelia says:

    Public baths and "skinship". I love all these concepts and I gained a new word!

  4. Rillquiet says:

    One of the most refreshing and unexpected parts of visiting a jjimjilbang, the Korean version of a bathhouse, was how reassuring it was: Everybody looks kind of ridiculous naked, and when you're surrounded by people of a variety of ages and body conditions, you realize that your own scars and bumps are just…there. (Also you can spend hours scrubbing your toes or lolling in hot water until you turn into a soggy prune or steaming yourself like a dumpling. It was glorious and relaxing after the first terrified "agh naked!" moment.)

    • Flitworth says:

      Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove jjimjilbang.

    • Kazoogrrl says:

      I love the idea of communal bathing, but as an intensely body-private person (no idea how I got this way, my parents never made nudity shameful) the thought of doing it makes me very tense. Friends keep trying to get me to one of our local Korean spas, but I won't do it even though it sounds like a nice idea.

      • Rillquiet says:

        Depending on the spa, there may be a clothing-required area where you could hang out: They're great places to nap, watch TV, shoot the breeze with friends, and enjoy snacky treats between sessions in the (clothed, coed) dry saunas. But obviously, do what works for you!

        ETA: One thing that helped me was that I'm very near-sighted. As soon as I take off my glasses, everyone else becomes blurry, so of course they cannot see me very well and I don't have to be self-conscious. I'm a bit bugblatter beast of Tra'al on my father's side.

    • Lynn says:

      A coworker (and fellow former Toastie) of mine raves about a bathhouse in our city where you can do this and how awesome it is. She goes all the time, but I haven't worked myself up to it yet.

    • beaucoup1314 says:

      I have never been and yet imagine this. As far I know, there no bath houses in our city. I recall reading a memoir from a long-time friend's son talking about the day Beethoven waited for his mother to complete her washing and to accompany her home. People didn't go there to connect. People went there to be clean.

  5. damngoodcoffee says:

    That Helen Garner article on aging was awesome. It's so funny when I think about my teenage self and how I kind of pitied older women, without realizing that they were just me (and younger women in general) with years of experience and without our paralyzing insecurities. This is a generalization, obviously, but I want to go back to my former self and reprimand her for even assuming those older women cared what she thought of them, at all.

  6. littleinfinity says:

    From Nicole Chung's link roundup, file under "JESUS CHRIST MALLORY" but also lol:

  7. meat_lord says:

    Wow, I super love this roundup.

    I <3 that essay on aging with all I've got! YESS PULL THAT HORRIBLE RACIST SCHOOLGIRL'S PONYTAIL. I'm actually quite excited to live a very long life and eventually arrive at the nirvana of Being Old and Not Giving A Fuck, like that author.

  8. Kazoogrrl says:

    For people who listen to Podcasts, The Sporkful has done several series about food, race, class, and culture, and they've mentioned the idea of worth and what you pay for food. Here is a link to one series, they used it to segue into a second series (and when he screws up and gets called on it, the host will own up to it later and apologize):

  9. vladazhael says:

    I bought a patch and two stickers from that first link, but I haven't read much else yet because my long-distance crush sent me this:

  10. Xolandra says:


    Re: aging – that was ~great~. My nod towards behaving badly/being seen in public is to hiss at people when they cut me off. I commute on my feet, people, I ain't got time for your shenangicans, i do not care how much slower you assume I am than you, if you cut me off and you're not wearing headphones, ima hiss at you, sidestep, and gtfo.

    COMMUNAL BATHING YES. My bestest favourite memory from Turkey (and I have a LOT of excellent memories) was visiting the hamam. I was seriously considering turning my basement into a hamam, until I worked out how much it would cost to cover so much space in marble, ha.

    I am ~fascinated~ by that food article! Especially since I got most of my food knowledge from first my French grandmother, then a French chef, but these days tend towards cooking Indian style dishes. And also because my father-out-law doesn't really like my cooking because it has, i shit you not, too many flavours.

  11. beaucoup1314 says:

    The older you get, the easier the hissing becomes. The rest of the time you carry a cane or umbrella to fend off idiots.. The rest of the time, you march your damn ass down the street and dare them to take you on. That, of course, never includes younger people who have either been trained to respect us old jobs or the ones who insist upon respect.

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