Thursday Link Dump

Clever Manka, · Categories: Thursday Link Dump

Patches available from NightlyMade Etsy store.

We talk a little bit about communal living here and I think even some of us anti-hippies would appreciate this cookbook (extra bonus: one of my Religious Studies profs knows the Lucy Horton and owns a copy of the cookbook). I’d also love to read the cookbook Honey from a Weed, based on this article. One of the recipe blogs I read posted a wedge salad recipe this week (he posted this muffuletta wedge salad last year) and even though I am supposed to avoid raw food, I am pining for a wedge salad.

Mayan weavers in Guatemala are challenging the appropriation of their designs. Original story from April (with video in Spanish) is here.

Remember last week’s sea silk artist? She has a fundraiser to support her and her work, which are apparently in danger as her museum was shut down last year.

Wrapping up the theme of domestic arts: A compendium of stain solutions, thanks to the University of Illinois Extension Service.

I miss my vices and smoking is one of those that I miss on a near-daily basis. Like the author’s, my indulgence was more aesthetic than addictive, but I am nostalgic for the days I could congratulate myself for making it through another 24 hours with a smoke on the porch. I don’t recommend reading “Taking Up Smoking at the End of the World” if you’re trying to get over the habit.

A long list of grim realities makes planning for anything feel like picking out curtains for a house I can’t afford: the systemic depravity of politics, Wall Street, Silicon Valley, any industry that starts with “Big,” the police; endless wars in countries most Americans cannot spell or find; and dire economic predictions for my entire generation. Pleasure is the only certainty. I can hardly think of a better time to start seriously smoking than this year, right now, today.

What Harvard’s rejection of Michelle Jones’s graduate school application says about actual beliefs regard rehabilitation.

How fashion adapted to climate change during the little ice age.

Laurie Penny writes about anger for Teen Vogue:

If angry women manage to successfully hide their inconvenient feelings, they are praised for being “strong.” So often, “strong woman” is used to mean “a woman who doesn’t complain.” At most, we are allowed to speak about fear, about upset. Society can cope with girls who are “broken” — but girls who burn with fury are a problem, and they need to be controlled. Whenever my friends and I have to deal with harassment, abuse, and threats from people who would rather we not talk about women’s rights, we can expect some sympathy as long as we talk only about how frightened we are. But we’re not just frightened. We’re furious. We’re livid, because what is happening to us is unfair and unjust.

And Karen Grierson writes about anger on her website:

…we often react in anger when we’ve been hurt and so, reactively, we want the source of our pain to feel what we feel. But on the thinking level, we recognize that “hurting other people is bad”, so we suppress the tendency (or think we suppress the behaviour) by trying to suppress the emotional content completely. “I don’t want to be a bad person who hurts others” is a common cultural narrative, one especially laden with caretaking overtones for women. So we associate “bad” with both the action and the feeling, and accept training that creates aversion to both action and emotion.

Variations on not all men, how to “own, apologize, and repair” when you’ve fucked up, and who can bear the burden of teaching others how to do it.

Guilt is not empathy. Neither is shame.  In fact, when people feel overwhelmed by their own inner feelings of guilt, they are more likely to attack the people around them rather than act empathetic. Feeling guilt does not make you a good person.  Empathy and responsiveness make you a good person. Guilt blocks empathy.

That octopus’s garden under the sea is a lot more involved that we might have thought.

Remember that ReWire documentary about the women’s clinics? They have a new podcast that starts today! “Every other week, Jessica Mason Pieklo and Imani Gandy will deliver entertaining and helpful legal analysis for resistance-minded folks, including important justice issues coming up in the courts, how legal processes work, and what cases and their outcomes mean for all of us.”

Okay I need to look into this band a little harder because this song is amazing.

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55 Responses to “Thursday Link Dump”

  1. vladazhael says:

    Submitted for your approval…

    This delightful zodiac thing: https://theestablishment.co/how-to-look-like-ever

    And my band's new song, released in celebration of the local anti-Trump protest tomorrow (he's going to be in town this weekend, and fortunately I will not be):

  2. damngoodcoffee says:

    The Karen Grierson article on anger is so wonderful. I have largely managed to avoid a lot of the 'pot boiling over' anger in my close interpersonal relationships, largely having to do with how I was raised. Actually, because my mother did a lot of boiling over when I was growing up, my problems with anger stem more from reacting to other people's. Hostility and emotional instability in general (especially when combined with a lack of self-awareness) make me very anxious if directed at me. But in general I try to express myself/my needs as much as possible to avoid any growing resentments, and I try to (if I can) avoid those who would not listen to my needs to deride them/make me feel bad for having them.

    All that said, for the anger I have where I feel impotent – anger against circumstances where I have little recourse? That anger goes through the exact interpretation process Grierson talked about and gets turned right into anxiety. And I didn't notice this at all until a past therapist pointed it out to me. She actually said, 'well, what you're describing sounds like a really aggravating situation more than anything else,' and it was like something clicked. Even my reaction to hostility from others- a lot of that is repressed anger that I don't feel like I can do anything about. I'm angry at them for taking their anger out on me and not treating people better, but I don't know what to do about it, because I don't know how to talk someone down from that kind of anger, especially if it's a pattern of behavior. So my anger turns into anxiety, because I don't know what to do.

    Something I have been able to do, though, is sit with the anger when it's turned towards myself before it makes its way to anxiety. I often get anxiety from being angry with myself for not doing something better or making a better decision, and I've learned recently to recognize that anger and acknowledge it before it does change into anxiety, which has legitimately helped me put things in perspective.

    tl;dr That article was spot on and relationships to anger can be super complicated.

    • CleverManka says:

      Anger -> Anxiety is a huge issue for me right now, too. I'm unable to act on the anger in ways I'm used to doing and meditation doesn't cut it for me when people are dying, you know?

  3. Kazoogrrl says:

    Two things quickly:

    I love this Goldfrapp song, which I discovered on the RAW Hannibal Spotify playlist:

    The guy whose Councilperson campaign I worked on last year (he won) was voted Best White Guy in a local paper's yearly poll. He wrote this about it:

    "I am proud to be a "City Paper kind of politician." As odd an accolade as "Best White Guy" is, I am proud of my work, and very thankful to be recognized by a paper that has been so valuable to Baltimore for so long. I am sad to see them going. I am so impressed by their editorial staff's steadfast willingness to remind our apartheid city that my position as a City Council member is one carved out by a system of white supremacy, that provides me white privilege that allows me to say what I want. It is a sick manifestation of the "sophistication of white supremacy, and how it operates", to quote local champion Dayvon Love of Leaders of a Beautiful Struggle, that a white person with comparatively shallow roots in the social and racial justice movement can pick up mere pieces of the lexicon and say the same things about racism that Black people have been saying throughout American history, and it gets attention and wins him recognition, rather than falling on deaf ears as so often has happened to Black voices."

    He's not perfect but he's a step in the right directions.

    • CleverManka says:

      Dang, you go White Guy Councilperson!

      Enjoying the "Monster Love" song and next up is one called "Eat Yourself" so I see why Fannibals like this album. I really want my energy back so I can write this Hannibal fanfic I've got rolling around in my head before they bring it back for S4 and Joss everything for me.

  4. littleinfinity says:

    UH-MAZING links today, Manka!! I am sitting here on a rainy day, reading through them in no particular order, blissfully sipping coffee and neglecting my work for the moment 🙂 the best.

    The Laurie Penny article specifically gave me a lot to think about (love her), and the commune cookbook article triggered a pang of commune-specific wanderlust that has been not-so-secretly brewing for quite a while now. Also, I've never been a smoker, but definitely identified with Taking Up Smoking At The End Of The World. I wanted to send it to J because he would love it, but he is a recovering smoker and I fear it would resonate in all the wrong ways.

  5. redheadfae says:

    Octlantis sounds like an undersea Borderlands.

    You know I always appreciate domestic tips because I had no education from my own fam, and very little HomeEc in school.

  6. m vasterling says:

    The silk weavers , skilled workers who bought their own looms, during the beginning of the Industrial Revolution within which we all live, protested the loss of living wage because everyone else would use manufactured products non-silk instead with machines. The product was subpar and yet people bought it. Aren't we doing the same today when we buy an electronic device that is not manufactured in a union shop here in the US? It is and always will be. I worry about peoples' jobs and sometimes I complain here

    • CleverManka says:

      Are any data/cell phones manufactured in the US? I mean, yes, the exploitation of overseas labor is a problem, but there's a lot going on there and we can't chide or expect people to live without technology in this world. Also, we need to be careful about placing blame on people for purchasing "subpar" products when that's all they can afford.

  7. Heathered says:

    Late again. It's that kind of week. When my depression was at its lowest I very much wanted to start smoking even though I've never done it or liked it. Bought some bro-tastic Camel snus instead for gross antisocial fun, but was really curious about the stuff from Sweden and my therapist (total enabler that she is) bought me some for my birthday! Gonna try it tomorrow, and I am totes excite.

    • Flitworth says:

      I'm not alone! I've never been a smoker either – I'm a chipper and occasionally had a cigarette with friends when out drinking but never regularly….yet these days I get so frustrated and imagine that a cigarette would just be so…cathartic.

      • jenavira says:

        Before I got my anxiety treated I used to have dreams, some of the most detailed, realistic dreams of my life, about smoking a cigarette. I woke up convinced I'd been sleep-smoking or something, it felt so real. (Note: to the best of my knowledge, I have never smoked a cigarette, and only a hooka two or three times.)

      • Heathered says:

        Yeah, it just feels true to the general awfulness of it all. (BTW, I had to look up "chipper" and learned a LOT about CrossFit before finding a definition that makes sense in this context, after which I wanted a smoke even more.)

    • CleverManka says:

      Lemme know what you think of the snus!

  8. Doc_Paradise says:

    FYI. Karen Grierson's beloved cat died yesterday and her other cat is ill. She has started a gofundme for vet expenses. Since she doesn't get paid for her articles on therapy, I'm sharing her gofundme here in case anyone wants to show support for her that way.
    https://www.gofundme.com/feline-medical-expense-f

  9. Flitworth says:

    OMFG Harvard. If only institutions could be punched.

    Also, fuck these guys? First they say that the problem is anyone could google this woman and discover her crime but then somehow also the problem is that she didn't detail it in her application. Which is it, fuckwits?

    How Harvard retains its reputation as a place for smart people while simultaneously defending bullshit by playing dumb (See also: Chelsea Manning) is beyond me.

    Basically, if you say you went to Harvard or try to Harvard name drop, you have just earned yourself a ticket to the back o' the line with me. I'm not saying I won't give you a chance but you best prove to me you aren't an entitled whiskerbiscuit who doesn't have the sense nature gave rocks. /rant

    • RoseCamelia says:

      They tend to say, "I went to school in Cambridge." Pretentious assholes.

      • Räven says:

        I went to a similar school, and often you do that in a forlorn attempt to not say the name of your college and have the conversation totally derailed by someone saying 'whoa! Whoa! So I guess you're really smart! I mean, you probably think you're smarter than me! Wow, smarty mcsmarty.'' Or they explain why your school is corporate garbage compared to their salt of the earth liberal arts college. So you spend a while petting someone's ego and stammering and hoping they'll just stop…. (If you were on a date, the date is already as good as over now.) Not saying the name rarely works of course, but it takes a good while to learn that.

        Don't get me wrong though HARVARD PEOPLE ARE THE WORST. hahaha.

        • Räven says:

          Actually I will add that of course, that is as a woman saying it to men, and like so many other ways in speaking to men it is to appear less threatening and stave off a bad reaction. Men who are being coy about their college are just twerps.

          • Flitworth says:

            Yea it's complicated. My mother in law went to Radcliffe and I went on a Harvard rant in front of the sister in law who got defensive and points out her mom (lovely, grounded woman) went. I said no, she went to Radcliffe because that's how much of a dick Harvard is, they wouldn't let women use their precious name for ages.

            I know there are plenty of decent humans who have gone to elite schools and, really, it's that dickery is institutionalized there and one is either cognizant of that or one assumes it's that way because one Gods gift.

            Sidebar: on the T in Cambridge last month, some college age kids got on and the only was to describe the one is that he was not wearing boat shoes and I presume it was because he forgot them in his daddy's other yacht. I also have strong feels about boat shoes and those who actually have a visible boat shoe aura.

          • RoseCamelia says:

            "visible boat shoe aura"

            😀

          • Räven says:

            Yeah, I mean I loved my school, and even though it's half a lifetime ago, most of my friends and much of the rest of my life come from that world. (Many of those friends *hated* it.) But I am not unaware of the problematic structures of these institutions, and I certainly noticed it at the time — and am aware that there was a whole shadow population of people who did not. :-/

    • LaxMom says:

      lol, Teenboy and I were signing him up for a second go at the SAT, and comparing minimum entry scores for the ivies. Currently, he's good enough for princeton, but not harvard or yale. The smart people must all be at Caltech–their MINIMUM score is 100 pts higher than any of the ivies for admission (1530 out of 1600).
      But rich people always get away with pretending to be smart, we know this.

    • CleverManka says:

      I mean, I want to watch academia burn in general, but yeah, especially Ivy League schools.

    • Lee Thomson says:

      "entitled whiskerbiscuit who doesn't have the sense nature gave rocks"

      A+ invective here, also if you figure out how to punch institutions I will STAND IN LINE to punch Harvard, and then offer up a couple of others as well…

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