Friday Open Thread

Clever Manka, · Categories: Open Thread


Hey, since I think most folks here are in the U.S. (condolences to us all), if you could please chime in with if you’ll be around next Friday? This week has been tough for me (I’m still recovering from that stupid cold) and I’m wiped. If you need the OT for a refuge from family situations or something, though, let me know! I’m happy to put up a post, just didn’t want to do so if most people wouldn’t be checking in here since I think I might not be around much that day, either.

155 Responses to “Friday Open Thread”

  1. Kazoogrrl says:

    I'll be around Friday, I think, probably sunk into the couch re-watching LOTR and knitting (I'm going to buy the digital extended versions, means less stuff).

    Here is my Friday outfit. I layer up because I have dance practice tonight, so there are leggings and a black tank underneath everything. The rest of the weekend is cleaning, Thanksgiving prep, cleaning, friend's 40th birthday party Sat night, and cleaning.

    And if anyone wants some Ragnarok links, these are about the political bent of the film, and the relevance, influence, and inclusion of Maori and Aboriginal material. Spoilers abound!

  2. CleverManka says:

    In an effort to get as much rest this weekend as possible, I'm doing laundry and my roots this afternoon. That's the goal, anyway. I put the sheets in the washer before I left for work to give me a head start. Crossing fingers that this plan doesn't blow up in my face and leave me overly exhausted. I really need the full weekend to try to get back to my old normal before the Kesha concert and head cold double-whammy. I have a four day weekend next week, but I'd like to be able to spend some of that doing something other than fucking resting, ugh.

    I had my teeth cleaned yesterday and I don't know if I've been better with my brushing and flossing (which seems unlikely, I've always been pretty, um, aggressive about my dental health), if something in my body has changed and I'm developing less tartar, or if the new dental hygienist (I've had the same one for over ten years but she retired) is just not as thorough but honestly my teeth don't feel any cleaner than than they did before my appointment and that's kind of sad-making. I always loved that squeaky-clean sensation. The new hygienist did mention that my bite guard was unusually free of build-up, so maybe it really is just body changes.

    It's something to bring up with AtN this afternoon at our appointment, anyway. Along with pressing questions like "are kale chips okay" and "am I ever going to be able to eat a potato again." I'm starting to not hate my nettle/dandelion root tea mixture with coconut milk (THANK DOGS I AM NOT SENSITIVE TO COCONUT MILK) so that's really nice.

    Also, in one of our email conversations earlier this week, AtN mentioned that my zinc levels were "superbly deficient" (based on my slow progress responding to the massive levels of zinc I'm taking every day) so at least I'm excelling at something.

    Oh! If anyone has something they'd like to contribute for a Monday post in case Amy is still under the weather, please drop me an email. Doesn't have to be fancy, just a little slice of life something or thoughts on a book you read/movie you've seen/whatever. I feel like three open threads a week are a bit much and we could probably use some variety.

  3. mowinda says:

    I'll be around!

    Inspired by last week's amazing Amazon dress I bought this:

    and I LOVE it. (I bought it in "orange peony" which no longer appears to be available.) I might just buy like 3 more in the different floral patterns and become that person who wears the same outfit in different colors every day

    • CleverManka says:

      Oh, I love it! I've been having a fun time layering dresses with skirts since I still haven't pulled out my winter wardrobe (oh shit, I forgot about that, welp, that's gonna wait until Thanksgiving weekend) and that looks like a great dress to use as a sort of chemise base. Thank you for the link!

      I might just buy like 3 more in the different floral patterns and become that person who wears the same outfit in different colors every day
      I fully approve of and support this plan. Also, think of the cardigan options! <3 <3 <3

    • Flitworth says:

      become that person who wears the same outfit

      I call this Charlie-Browning and it is my life goal.

    • Kazoogrrl says:

      Glad it worked out! I may buy several more in black, because I'm un-adventurous.

    • jenavira says:

      …it's been years since I wore dresses regularly, but my office has finally reached the kind of temperature balance where I don't massively overheat when I wear leggings under things, and I think that a wardrobe of these + leggings + cardigans might mean I never have to wear pants to work again.

    • redheadfae says:

      Is it soft fabric? It's great!
      I bought this in an XXL (I'm a 14 dresses) and the fabric is like those famous leggings. I've ended up wearing it all the time around the house, and layering it with a Cuddl-Duds cowl neck tunic.

      • mowinda says:

        It is! It's soft and stretchy but the fabric doesn't stretch thin (at least so far) around my uh, larger parts and it still manages to have a shape
        UPDATE: I just bought like 3 more

        • redheadfae says:

          I love it.. it does look like the same sort that I bought, thank you for the share. It's on my wishlist now.
          Is the sizing accurate?

    • littleinfinity says:

      Oooh so pretty!! I love the flare around the waist. It looks super comfortable too??

  4. Doc_Paradise says:

    I have no reason to be absent due to holidays next Friday. That said, I'm often out and about on Fridays (which is why I'm more active on Wednesday open posts).

    I tried water colour pencils this week and really liked them so I'm going to pick up some water colour paper to play around with. I'm also going to take a few books I am overdue reviewing (read them already) out to a coffee shop to work on this afternoon.

    I came back from my trip feeling good about myself (people LIKE me) and challenged about myself and my future direction. That is motivational catnip for me. A while back I mentioned that I had enough energy for only 1.5 of 3 things in addition to health+family+paid work: social life, creative life, or meaningful work. I was leaning in this direction anyway… but my trip and the excellent conversations I had on it settled something for me…

    I'm going to put my energy into meaningful work and a creative life. I think I need to, for my own wellbeing. Having my head stuffed full of meaningful and thought provoking interactions is just better for me than trying to maintain a social circle. I think the relationships that come out of shared meaning, direction, or creation are actively better for me.

  5. Flitworth says:

    Yesterday I ended what I'm pretty confident was a 38 year streak of not cussing in front of my religious paternal aunt. She was kind enough to call because it was my mom's birthday and she knew we'd be feeling the loss. My husband tried to hand me the phone when I came in from the chicken shed and I said "I can't, my hands are covered in chicken shit". I sent flowers to my dad and maternal aunt for lack of any better ideas on marking the occasion.

    She had my religious grandmother's bible re-bound and is sending it to me.

    Some project manager whose work skype message is "don't hate the player, hate the GAME" has been making one case a pain for me. I haven't interacted with him directly but I absolutely want to look him in the eye and tell him that people spit in his food when he eats out.

    They've appointed tiny human 'librarian' at preschool as a behavior management reward. It's working well but I'm hearing what sounds like an authoritarian streak come out when kids don't put away book so we'll see how long it lasts before I get a call about goose-stepping or demands of allegiance.

  6. Rillquiet says:

    I might peek in on Friday but would support a day off for Gracious Hostess, absolutely. And I'll see about putting something small together for Monday; I'll send it and you can use it if necessary, no hard feelings if not.

    This weekend I get to be reunited with the furball, who's been eating his head off in pasture at a friend's farm and who I hope remembers how to tolerate being under saddle. Then there's a parade to watch, a practice to attend, and the pre-Thanksgiving Stretch Your Stomach party to enjoy. My contribution to the latter will be last night's pumpkin blondies (this recipe, which NB definitely understates the baking time), lest I eat them all myself. The punchline? It's all on Saturday. Sunday is going to be a literal day of rest.

    • CleverManka says:

      pre-Thanksgiving Stretch Your Stomach party
      This is the best holiday tradition I've ever heard. Someday when I have energy and can eat normally I am totally hosting one. Thank you for this fantastic idea.

      • Rillquiet says:

        It's essentially Friendsgiving while acknowledging that most of us don't need to eat two turkey dinners in a week, so the hosts make lasagna and everyone else brings what they please. We may all be liberal heathens, but we are grateful for one another.

  7. jenavira says:

    I'll be back at work on Friday, so I'll be around (and probably bored out of my skull).

    This weekend's plans are apparently still up in the air, which is Not Optimal. Someday I will convince people that I need more than two days' notice when planning things, but it's hard to draw that line when I tend to let emails sit for weeks unanswered.

    Bringing an ISO to the main open thread: anybody know of any good body-positivity / body-acceptance stuff for trans or nonbinary people? I am at that point where I'm pretty sure that's what I need to be working on, but I'm not interested in "loving my womanly curves" or anything.

    • CleverManka says:

      Maybe Doc Paradise has some input? I thought I'd had something like this in a link dump recently, but I went back a few weeks and didn't find it. Sorry! I'll be on the lookout for articles for future dumps.

      • jenavira says:

        No worries! I barely know what I'm looking for (and yes, I do remember that link from a while ago – I think from The Body Is Not an Apology) so I'm just trying to cast as wide a net as possible.

        • Doc_Paradise says:

          The Body is Not an Apology sometimes has stuff… at least, more stuff than most places. I've been mostly doing "guess and test" type things and some of them are working. A lot of what has been working for me has been coming from a focus on personal health (as in, what is healthy for ME and discovering that).

          • jenavira says:

            awww, but that's exactly what I'm trying not to do!

            Mostly kidding. In all honesty, I'm so disconnected from my own body that I am genuinely not aware of what level of pain I'm in at any given moment and I'm not always sure what "hungry" feels like, as opposed to "I would like to put some food in my face right now." (My mom got a surprise diagnosis of MS in her forties, my sister a surprise diagnosis of fibromyalgia at 29. I will admit that part of me is afraid that if I start listening to my body I'm going to get something similar.)

          • Doc_Paradise says:

            Ah. Okay. I might have some resources for you and some of my personal experience might be useful as well. My own pain response is … complicated. For personal experiences… contact me via email or DW messaging.

            Have you looked at health, stress, or trauma related body connection stuff? Was that useful?

          • jenavira says:

            I am just beginning in this area, I haven't looked at much. I do know my library has a copy of The Body Keeps the Score, which I've checked out in the past but haven't had time to get to.

          • Doc_Paradise says:

            I found "When the body says No" by Gabor Mate useful when I was first digging into wtf was up with my body. It isn't a non-binary book but I found it a good launching pad for exploring things that have let me separate out the various types of disconnection I have from my body.

          • jenavira says:

            …available at my other library. Thanks!

          • Doc_Paradise says:

            Found something!

            I've been watching Dara's videos and I like them. Some of them may have some of what you are asking about.

    • meat_lord says:

      Anybody know of any good body-positivity / body-acceptance stuff for trans or nonbinary people? I am at that point where I'm pretty sure that's what I need to be working on, but I'm not interested in "loving my womanly curves" or anything.

      Oof, do I ever feel you. I need to keep up a steady intake of body-positive content for my own well-being, but the kind of "goddess!! womanly curves!! fat babe!!" stuff that is aimed at women makes me extremely dysphoric.

      I'll see what I can come up with and report back.

  8. Kazoogrrl says:

    Just called out a guy on my neighborhood group. The discussion was about a break in, turned into city versus suburban crime, and he said he'd use #metoo as a crime victim but that it has been coopted. Engage space lasers.

  9. Lee Thomson says:

    I'm cold. Which is good.

    I'm migraining, which in not good. But I am also medicated, and when it works it will be good.

    Anyone want to geek about tarot with me? I still need three of the major arcana, and I cannot think what they might be, and also I am rethinking face cards for the stones cards which were going to the bullet fish – sleek and silver and fast, but I think I need a codfish in there, and it means rearranging everything.

    Friday will just be weird, but I do like seeing you all and hearing what is up.

  10. redheadfae says:

    I have to dress today as I have outdoor errands, but damn if I haven't lifted my ass off the couch yet.
    I got denied SSA, however, they never asked for my medical records and I couldn't get into my online account to make the authorization, because they sent me a BLANK temporary password. Ugh. I made a suggestion they do it the way handles password resets by phone.
    I refuse to let them get me down, it's time to search out legal assistance.

  11. littleinfinity says:

    I can't say for sure about Friday because I always have really good intentions to show up to the open thread whenever I have a random Friday off, and then I always forget until I facepalm at 5 pm. So! If there is one I may remember to show up, but please feel very very free to take the day off and eat/ sleep/ etc!

  12. Heathered says:

    I'm with littleinfinity, very likely I'll be around but take care of yourself & rest if need be! They're putting a new sewer system in here which is good–it has been an ongoing situation since I moved in bc the pipes are from 1803 or something–but my God is it loud, and no flushing between 8-6 for several days. NaNo is going okay. Wellbutrin and I are not doing well. I've slipped back into moderate depression and had roughly a week of dealing with compulsive behavior that was very unlike me and thus kind of traumatizing above and beyond the call. Thus, very depleted and weepy now. I'm trying to give it a month, but oof, and if it doesn't work and I'm sent back to square one? OOF.

    • damngoodcoffee says:

      Oof indeed- I'm so sorry you've had a hard time the past week. I hope you are able to get some rest/quiet time this weekend, away from the sewer work.

    • LaxMom says:

      I found that the adjustment was harder if I was on the standard release wellbutrin. I would get headaches like crazy. Once I got used to the extended release, then tweaking my dose with the quick-release pills was ok, but just trying to get to steady state on the regular/quick/standard release pills was not happening.

      OTOH, it was the easiest to come off of, when I did. No brain zaps or headaches at all coming off.

      • Heathered says:

        Thank you! I'm not optimistic about being able to stay on this, but if it seems worth it to push through I'll look into extended release. Really waiting for science to tell me what I already know: Pancakes are the best antidepressant.

        • Flitworth says:

          Ymmv but I had to move to 300mg to get sustained benefit from Wellbutrin. I was on 250 for a while but still swung low enough to have to make a change

          • Heathered says:

            Oh wow. 75 has basically turned my life upside down, I can't imagine trying to increase the dose. Maybe BUCKWHEAT pancakes.

    • CleverManka says:

      Oh dear, that is a LOT to be dealing with. Hugs.

    • Lee Thomson says:

      I'm so sorry you feel like you're going backwards – the best I can offer is commiserating internet hugs

      • Heathered says:

        You did more than that–I just spent a chunk of time looking at your beautiful tarot art (and I'm pretty sure I saw your amazing boat in the mix as well). I wish I had ideas for you, but all I can think of is a scale loaded with periwinkles for Justice.

    • redheadfae says:

      Argh, I'm so sorry. I hate the trial runs. My psych has taken a genetic test for me that supposedly matches the best med for depression to our genetic makeup. I don't know what it's going to cost me yet, it looks like on the website about $330, but the initial pre-insurance processing I got is like $6000+ EEEK.
      I'll report back when I know more. It's called GenScript, and it's just a cheek swab at the doc's office.

  13. damngoodcoffee says:

    I will be w/the fam next Friday. Not sure what we'll be doing, but I can't guarantee I'll be in for the OT (my family will likely be driving me up the wall, but not in a really bad way, just in a 'I'm used to living alone and silence' kind of way).

    I got my CM postcard!! Thank you so much! I want to start collecting them and sending them out to people now; that's such a nice thing to do.

    This weekend I have Monday off, and I'm not exactly sure what my plans will be. I did really enjoy seeing Thor yesterday (I was completely unspoiled aside from the trailer, and I definitely had a moment of 'is… is that Matt Damon?' during that one scene). I have no plans to see Justice League, no matter how much I liked Wonder Woman.

    • jenavira says:

      Oh! I also got my postcard this week – thank you so much!

    • CleverManka says:

      So glad you liked the card! And hard same on Justice League. There was a preview at the Ragnarok showing I went to and it was so terrible I actually laughed out loud at one point.

    • Absotively says:

      I only just read about the whole Amazon costumes thing, and the article I read said DC switched out Zack Snyder for Joss Whedon because Wonder Woman did so well. Which is baffling. Why would they put in Joss Whedon instead of trying to get Patty Jenkins to do it? Are they so confused by the existence of female directors that they can't fathom giving a movie to one unless it focuses on a female protagonist? Did they not pay attention to how much the Wonder Woman loving parts of the internet hated Whedon's Wonder Woman script?

      Haven't seen any Justice League trailers yet, but it's really not on my planned to-watch list.

      • Flitworth says:

        A friend of mine has been hounded by Zack Snycker fanboys for 3 days and counting now over her mild critique regarding boob armor. White men are the most delicate of snowflakes.

        • Absotively says:

          I just… aargh. Dammit. I am sometimes willing to ignore it when a movie does something sexist and stupid because I like watching explosions. But I am stunned by how far out of their way they went to do something that they should have known would be poorly received.

          • damngoodcoffee says:

            Right? B/c it seems like people are doubling down on their defensiveness of the costumes, too. I came across some ridiculous mansplain-y article about the whole thing, about how it was really important for everyone to just understand the context of the clothing, and how Snyder was trying to make it closer to The 300, and they were shirtless there, so blah blah blah. And like, I thought the costumes could have been a lot more obectifying than they were, but it's like, is this really the hill some men want to die on? Jenkins' WW did it better, is the important point that I think people are trying to side step when they get all bent out of shape about the backlash to the costumes.

      • Absotively says:

        Update: Am not sure where the Whedon stuff was, actually, because I can't find that article and now that I've bothered to look up the movie it is directed by Zach Snyder. And I guess the timing would make no sense. Maybe it was referring to a later/future movie?

      • Absotively says:

        Also: I just read IMDB's synopsis of the plot, which apparently focuses on Bruce Wayne. Since the entire plot of Batman vs. Superman was "Bruce Wayne is an idiot," this has killed any remaining interest I might have had in seeing Justice League.

    • Heathered says:

      Thank you for reminding me of a good thing from this week: I got my postcard, too! Thanks, Manka! I apologize for being so addlepated that I spent a few minutes thinking, "Who is OM?" before getting my Sherlock on.

  14. Onymous says:

    I'll be here. I actually have all of Friday off and enough of Thursday that I won't just be sleeping through Friday.

    Largely unrelated this chocolate rosemary cake was a huge hit when I made it for class. Notes: The olive oil is not important butter might end up a bit strong but any oil would be fine; some lemon would be fucking choice.

    • meat_lord says:

      That cake sounds GODLY. Wow.

      • Onymous says:

        This wasn't the cake that taught me but: rosemary is a great compliment to otherwise desert flavors. Also ignoring any flavoring: it is a solid AF cake recipe, like next time I make a cake I'm using those proportions as the base.

    • CleverManka says:

      That cake sounds amazing! I love unusual food/taste combos.

      Congratulations on your upcoming days off! I hope they're delightful.

      • Onymous says:

        I don't know precisely when it happened but at some point I started thinking of rosemary as 'resinous' innstead of 'herbal' and ever since I've been shoving it into everything and haven't yet been disappointed.

        • Lee Thomson says:

          That is a wonderful thing to know because I have always had a thing for rosemary but never known quite what to do with it. The answer is Everything. I think that could be combined with my answer for all vegetables, which is Roast Them?

    • damngoodcoffee says:

      Woah that cake looks/sounds delicious!

  15. meat_lord says:

    I'll be around on Friday!

    I'm going shopping for cosplay materials after work with the friends that I'm going to the con with. It should be a lot of fun, and very productive.

  16. vladazhael says:

    I will likely not be computering at all next Friday, so I would not object to a much-deserved break for most excellent hostess. In fact I barely made it here today, despite having a much easier workday than I did for the past couple. I have been productive all week, though, which I think is a pretty solid argument for this whole working remotely thing being viable. *fingers crossed* that others see it the same way.

    Tomorrow will be a bit of a mini-adventure: the manfriend and I will be driving a few hours away to a midpoint to meet my parental units for lunch. So *fingers crossed* also that he will charm them as I think he will. All parties concerned are decent people and I'm not worried, but of course I will not be fully reassured until I see harmonious interactions actually happening. (And doubly so if it isn't followed later by weird nitpicky questions from my mom.)

  17. Lee Thomson says:

    AAaaaaahhh – My offspring just brought miniature highland Cattle to my attention, and the babbies look like stuffies and the adults come up to one's waist, loook: (well, it is breeding info, but the pictures are good too) ETA more better pics here:

    and also talk me into (or out of) these boots:… Thank you.

  18. Räven says:

    I'll be around Friday but if you take the day off we can all just scuffle around the Wednesday chat not expecting your (always appreciated) gif reactions. You can have holidays!

  19. Onymous says:

    There will probably be a slightly more full accounting of this on Wednesday but I just flew from New Mexico to Tennessee on Saturday and back on Monday (today) because my mom "had a 50/50 shot of seeing Monday." My aunts and uncles showed up and one of my aunts raised hell about the standard of care and now my mom is definitely not dying today.

    I swear to fuck, never have parents, they're just a fucking hassle.

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